Posted by: Nick Walters | August 12, 2009

La Roux

La Mioux

Let’s get it out of the way first: YES, IT IS RETRO. This could have been released in 1982, but for two things: the production, which has a lushness perhaps not achievable with 80s music technology; and a reference to the blandness of “early Nineties decor” in Colourless Colour. Those two things aside, this album could have been, in an alternative history, part of the 80s electropop brigade alongside Yazoo, Erasure, Human League, Eurythmics et al.

So what stops La Roux – the album – being an empty effort in mere revivalism? Which, frankly, it does look and sound like on first acquaintance. I think it’s two things: one, the intent behind it, the choosing of La Roux as a name and personality, the deliberate choice to make the music this way, to make a statement, maybe, about the perceived “coldness” of electronic pop; and two, Elly  Jackson herself – her personality, attitude and emotions, which shine through the package giving real heart to what could be a shallow, disposable experience.

The first thing first. La Roux the persona, the image. It makes for an alluring, compelling, complete package – a lot of thought has been put into this, and it works incredibly well. I got into La Roux by just hearing the name, seeing a photo of Elly with that wonderful hair and reading that she chose the name La Roux because it means “red-headed one”. As a ginger myself, I was interested and amused; so I found In For The Kill on YouTube, and was hooked. Look at that cover – Roxy Music is in there, so is Metropolis, so is Annie Lennox, Gary Numan, androgynous waif-boys and big 80s hair. But in this interview, when asked if she was into 80s revivalism, Elly Jackson responded: “Legwarmers and shoulder pads and bouffant hair, stuff like that, no. This is a fifties-inspired quiff! Get a grip.” So there’s more at work here than plundering the 1980s. In that interview, Elly Jackson comes across as astute, aware, and determined to do things on absolutely her own terms:

I remember Lady Gaga asked me, and I don’t think she knew that I was a duo, [adopts American cocaine fashbitch voice] ‘So who did you make your album with’, so I explained, and she said ’so who are you going to work with on your next record?’ and I said ‘Ben Langmaid’, [her co-writer] and she said ‘aren’t you going to want to work with other producers, guys like Raekwon or Timbaland or someone like that, you can’t turn that down’. And I said ‘yeah I can’. ‘Cos they wouldn’t know me, and wouldn’t understand me, and if I went out to LA someone would say ‘you’d like nice in a dress’, and I’d have to say ‘fuck you’.”

Which leads into the second factor, Elly herself. Much has been made of the fact that this album was recorded during a difficult relationship break-up, which – if I was feeling cynical – I would say was just another facet of the La Roux sell. But listening to the album – especially the ballads Cover My Eyes and Armour Love – I think there is some truth in it. There is a kind of fragile, embattled melancholy in Elly’s voice, and a personal aspect to the lyrics which contrast effectively with the bold synthetic music.

In For The Kill opens the album, and its only fault is over-familiarity. However it sets the scene perfectly, and sounds amazing coming out of my floor-standers; I’d been used to hearing it on my crappy computer speakers. It begins a run of four songs, all of which sound like massive hits and indeed three were. Tigerlily is a rather sinister song about stalking, complete with Thriller-style monologue by Elly’s dad, which is the album’s only mis-step – it seems out of place, and people are bound to think it was done in honour of Michael Jackson when of course it must have been recorded long before his death. Quicksand follows, its staccato synths building to an overpowering crescendo that sounds amazing on (decent!) headphones. Then comes Bulletproof, finishing the opening quartet. The least effective of the trio of singles, it works well on the album, and it perhaps the most retro song here. There’s even a vocoder bit which sounds exactly like something I’ve heard before but which I can’t quite place – a trick La Roux pull off time and time again.

Colourless Colour slows things down a bit, necessarily after that storming opening quartet. There’s a synth chord in it which recalls Yello’s Desire; intentional? Maybe, maybe not – another clever La Roux ruse (rouxse?!). A milder song, with the aforementioned opaque lyrics about the pastel hues of the 1990s. I love the way Elly pronounces “Colourless Colour” as if it was one word. And there’s a bit where she sings about the sun sinking in to which fair makes the hair on the back of the head stand up.

Next single I’m Not Your Toy is annoying at first, its stylophone riff sounding cheesy, but the chorus is a killer, and it should be another huge hit, though one that detractors will pounce upon.  Cover My Eyes follows, the album’s centrepiece ballad, and, though the emotion really comes through, the music’s reductionist rinky-dinkiness recalls the first Band Of Holy Joy album, a reference I reckon no-one will get, and which I very much doubt is intentional – but you never know. I’d like to think of Elly and Ben listening to Tales From The City and thinking, hey, this is a great sound.

As If By Magic is another low-key affair like Colourless Colour, with a warm synth riff and yet another chorus which lodges itself in the mind for days to come. Fascination follows, and it’s all over the place, especially the vocals – here’s where Elly most resembles Annie Lennox (Touch period). The music reminds me of the Xenomania-produced Lightning Strikes Twice off the last Saint Etienne album. Again, intentional, dunno, maybe.

Reflections are Protections is next – and, I have to say, having two songs with ‘-shun’ rhymes right next to each other on the same album is so knowing and arch it almost turns into a giggling cartoon cat. That it doesn’t sound calculated is another example of the effortless ease of La Roux. It’s the album’s longest and most experimental track and is the direction I’d like to see them take on the next album. Armour Love closes proceedings and is a slow-burning ballad with lovely warm buzzing bleeping synths and lovelorn words from Elly.  But the album isn’t quite over – there’s an extra track, Growing Pains. It’s as good as anything on the album, and should really have come before Armour Love, which is as perfect a closing track as you would want. Still, that’s my only criticism and it probably doesn’t matter in this era of downloads where probably no-one listens to albums as a whole any more. But let’s not get into nostalgia for the days before MP3s or even CDs because, despite the sound of their album, that is plainly NOT what La Roux are about.

Posted by: Nick Walters | August 3, 2009

Future Bristol

Just another quick plug for the SF compilation wot I am in.

2zppe01

Andy Bigwood's wonderful cover for Future Bristol

As featured in the Bristol Evening Post

My story, Trespassers, concerns two hapless young urban explorers, the Clifton Rocks Railway, a painful Dr Who joke, a sexy space babe and  A TERRIFYING INSECTILE MONSTER AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!

Posted by: Nick Walters | July 28, 2009

Prefab Sprout: Let’s Change The World With Music

I didn’t believe this was happening, until I heard this

I don’t mind admitting that I am crying as I type this.

It’s out in September and the (rather worryingly twee) track list is

1. Let There Be Music
2. Ride
3. I Love Music
4 . God Watch Over You
5. Music Is A Princess
6. Earth, The Story So Far
7. Last Of The Great Romantics
8. Falling In Love
9. Sweet Gospel Music
10. Meet The New Mozart
11. Angel Of Love

But after hearing the title track, my faith is more than restored.

And I love the beard.

Posted by: Nick Walters | July 20, 2009

The Barmy World of Yello No. 1: The Eye

Yello are fab.

There should be a new album soon, Touch Yello, and rumours are that it’s a double. I could fill pages eulogising their brilliance, but I want to focus on just one aspect of Yello. Not the music, but the sleevenotes.

Their last album, 2003’s The Eye, is great, but the sleevenotes are something else. They conjure images that are at an oblique tangent to the actual songs and even reality itself. Sophisticated, barmy, surreal, they are the product of the mind of Dietier Meier – the world’s coolest multi-millionaire – and are, though it sounds heretical, sometimes better than the actual songs.

You gotta say yes to another excess:

Planet Dada
Ramses II, the pharoah who left our galaxies two millenniums BC, is reincarnated in Philadelphia as DJ Ram and lectures about the subject of his long way back.

That sets the scene excellently. We’ve left Earth and its grammar way behind already. Genius.

Nervous
Many reasons to get nervous, but Joe La Placa here feels he is about to fall in love. With no defense left, to the surprise of his assistant, the otherwise smooth operator admits the calamity.

Sounds like a plot for a particularly emo Dr Who story.

Don Turbulento
Don Turbulento, after a serious dive into a chill-out session in Rio de Janeiro, follows the sound of a distant beat into the jungle and has not been seen since.

Love how these are like outlines for movies. Don Turbulento – WHAT a name! – seems to be another of Meier’s quixotic, eternally perplexed secret agent Euro-noir characters a la Random Tox (from a previous album) and the aforementioned Joe La Placa.

Soul On Ice
Heat in the city, cold as ice, the streets are shining, reflecting her eyes, the second I see her come through the door, I’m loosing my mind, I’m existing no more.

Switching to the first person, this is a typical Meier scenario: the hero lost, confused, pursuing a femme fatale through a techno-noir landscape and finally going insane or expiring.

Junior B
Butch, the queen of crooning, meets Trans-Reggae and melts away in Ricks’ cafe, overlooking Sugar Bamboo Bay.

I love that. Read it again, and wallow in the world it summons up inside your brain.

Tiger Dust
Who, when and what? The son of Buddha couldn’t care less and wants to hear the question one more time.

Clearly, complete bollocks. But a special kind of complete bollocks unique to Yello.

Distant Solution
Soft, too soft, a suburban macho tries to sing his way into the heart of Mercedes, who smiles and drives him over the hill.

Do you see what he’s done there? Mercedes – is she a car, or is she a gal? Who knows in the barmy world of Yello?!

Hipster’s Delay
The trumpet kid keeps it cool, and dances away on the ocean of sticks and bubbles.

Of course, everyone knows that pesky ocean of sticks and bubbles. A real bummer to navigate.

Time Palace
Who is singing between my mind and the moon?

This is, to me, the single greatest sleevenote ever written. It scares me – it’s like something whispered softly in your ear by a lunatic goblin in the small hours of the morning.

Indigo Bay
On a steamer in space, King Voodoo zooms into the next dimension.

I like to imagine that this inspired Russell T Davies to write Voyage of the Damned, but  of course it didn’t. I’d like to see a Doctor Who villain called King Voodoo, though. That would be cool.

Unreal
In a labyrinth of crystals, love shines bright and the lonely monkey peels his third banana.

By now, you know you are in the company of unhinged genius. And what’s that, Dieter? A euphemism for wanking? A little crude for Yello – I like to think this is unintentional, and he really DOES mean that a lonely monkey is actually eating a banana.

Bougainville
Travelling in circles, the lights of the unknown city are near and far.

Mild by comparison to its stablemates, but note the sense of travelling never to arrive.

Star Breath
A streetcar made of glass roars uphill and fades away into a treadmill where drumming monks try to make themselves invisible.

Breathaking, genius Yellobollocks of the HIGHEST order!

Planet Dada (Flamboyant)
The planet Dada is plugged in straight to the brain of a man who can only think music, and in this piece he gets lost on his own road map.

At last, all is explained.

Who needs reality? The barmy world of Yello is a place I love to live – lonely monkeys, drumming monks,  pharaoh DJs, voodoo kings, trumpet kids and girls who are cars and all!

Posted by: Nick Walters | July 5, 2009

Feathered Friends (Part 1)

A chicken, a goose and a turkey walk in to a pub.

“CLUCK! CLUCK! A pint of Stella! CLUCK! Please! Barman! CLUCK!” says the chicken.

“HONK! HONK! A pint of Best please, HONK! Good sir!” says the goose.

“GOBBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE! A Bacardi Breezer for me! GOBBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE!” says the turkey.

As the barman pours the drinks the three fowl argue about who pays.

“CLUCK! I got the last CLUCKing round it, at the Red Lion! CLUCK!” asserts the chicken.

“HONK! You lying HONKer! cries the goose. “That was me!” HONK!”

“GOBBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE! Gollocks!” interjects the turkey. “You haven’t bought a GOBBLE GOBBLE! round all GOBBLE! evening!”

“HONK! No way! HONK!” protests the goose.

“CLUCK! Yes way – pay CLUCK! up! CLUCK! Or CLUCK! else!” threatens the chicken.

“That’ll be eight pounds thirty, please, chaps” says the barman.

“HONK! WHAAAAAT?! HONK!” yells the goose. “The best HONK! part of ten HONKing quid for three HONK! drinks? How do you HONK! work that HONK! out?!”

The barman frowns and folds his arms. “Two eighty-five for the Stella, two fifty for the Best, and two ninety-five for the Breezer, equals eight pounds and thirty pence.”

“CLUCK! He’s right! CLUCK!” said the chicken, who was a clever chicken, and good at mental arithmetic.

“HONK! You always go for the most expensive HONK! HONK! drinks!” says the goose accusingly to the turkey.

“GOBBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE! It will all come out in the GOBBLE! wash!” says the turkey uncertainly.

“HONK! Huh! HONK!” responds the goose.

“CLUCK! CLUCK! We should get some crisps and CLUCK! nuts!” announces the chicken. “I’m feeling… rather… PECKISH!”

The three fowl collapse in clucks, honks and gobbles of laughter at this joke whilst the barman looks on in mounting despair.

“GOBBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE! Three packets of McCoy’s please!” the turkey manages to say through honks of mirth.

“HONK! Why is it always on my HONKing round that we buy the HONKing snacks?” mutters the goose, but everyone ignores him.

The barman sights. “What flavour?”

“CLUCK! One Salt and CLUCK! Vinegar, one Cheese and one CLUCK! Plain please! CLUCK!” says the chicken excitedly.

“GOBBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE! What about nuts?” says the turkey.

“CLUCK! Oh yeah – I CLUCK! forgot!” says the chicken. “And a packet of dry roasted CLUCK! peanuts please!”

“HONK! I want plain! HONK!” cries the goose.

“CLUCK! Okay we’ll get both! CLUCK” smirks the chicken.

“HONK! Arse! HONK! This is gonna cost me a pretty HONK! penny!” wails the goose.

“GOBBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE! I want some Mini Cheddars! GOBBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE!” yells the turkey.

The goose rounds on him, hissing in anger. “HONK! HONK! HONK! You greedy HONKing cunt! First the nuts, now the Mini HONK! Cheddars! And on my HONKing round! HONK! You pay for these! HONK! YOU PAY!”

“Calm down please or I’ll have to ask you to leave!” shouts the barman.

“CLUCK! Just pay – we’ll CLUCK! sort it out later! CLUCK!” says the chicken soothingly.

“That’ll be twelve pounds and fifteen pence,” says the barman.

“HONK! WHAAAAT?” splutters the goose. “How the HONK do you work THAT out?”

The barman says, through gritted teeth, “Seventy pence each for the crisps, ninety for the nuts, and eighty-five for the Mini Cheddars, comes to three pounds eighty-five, added to the drinks, comes to twelve fifteen.”

“CLUCK! Hang on! CLUCK!” says the chicken, cogitating. “CLUCK! Yes – he’s right. CLUCK!”

“HONKing hell,” mutters the goose, getting out his wallet. “I have to HONK! break in to a HONKing twenty now.”

The three fowl collect their drinks and snacks and retreat to a corner table. They munch happily for a while until the chicken says:

“CLUCK! CLUCK! Anyone fancy a game of pool?”

TO BE CONTINUED

Posted by: Nick Walters | July 3, 2009

Moving tribute to Michael Jackson

This had me in tears…

…of larffter.

Another palpable hit from the Socks!

Posted by: Nick Walters | June 30, 2009

Summer

The air stands still and shimmers
Cities sweat
Everybody thinks: seaside!
Parks and lakesides swoon with lovers
Children run forever in the endless
Endless school holidays
And the cunts next door
Play Razorlight
Loudly
At their barbecue tonight
And therefore
Must die
Sigh.
Summer

Posted by: Nick Walters | June 9, 2009

Christmas is Coming

Saw this today outside the Swallow Royal Hotel in Bristol:

Image077

I suppose it IS only 28 and a half weeks away.

Merry Christmas to one and all.

Posted by: Nick Walters | June 7, 2009

Doves: Kingdom of Rust

Even the cat looks bored

Even the cat looks bored

Something about this doesn’t excite me, and I’m not sure what. It’s not a bad album by any means, nor are Doves a bad band. Some of the songs here – the title track, Jetstream and Winter Hill especially – are fantastic. Perhaps its because it’s my first Doves album, in fact I know nothing of their other work. Or perhaps it’s just the universal critical praise heightening my expectations too much. Or perhaps it’s because the lumbering “funk” experiment, Compulsion, the longest track on the album, is shite. Really, REALLY shite. They seem to be trying to sound like Blondie, for fuck’s sake! Come on, lads, have some dignity – it’s not funky, it’s not experimental, it’s just bad, a b-side piss-around at best. Now I know Doves used to be Sub Sub, but that doesn’t forgive Compulsion. A far better example of their fusion of elegaic mope-rock and dance is Jetstream with its propulsive bass and skittering rhythms. If more of the album were in this vein, well yay, but, sadly, it ain’t.

Kingdom of Rust, the song, is the best thing here, following on from Jetstream and sending expectations rocketing even higher for the rest of the album. With a great tune, Wild West riffs, and a sense of bleak forlorn open spaces, this is the song that made me sit up and notice. Again if the rest of the album had been up to scratch, whooo. But then we get The Outsiders which I can’t even remember, and there are several other tracks which similarly fail to lodge in the memory. Birds Flew Backwards almost erases itself as you listen to it. Unfortunately, I can’t forget Compulsion, for all the wrong reasons. The closing tracks which follow, the frantic Mirrorball and the slightly twee ballad Lifelines, aren’t enough to make up for it.

It’s like the last Elbow album, which also fails to move me. Competent, heartfelt, professional, worthy, critically lauded, Northern. (And it’s not because I’m a southern Jessie that Doves don’t work for me; most of my favourite bands are from up North: The Fall, Smiths, Beautiful South etc.) Funnily enough there are two tracks – Spellbound by Doves and The Loneliness Of A Tower Crane Driver by Elbow – which sound exactly and interchangeably the same. Swap the CDs round in their cases and I’d barely notice.

Posted by: Nick Walters | June 6, 2009

The Snails That Failed

090606 Failed Snails

Once upon a time, there were some snails. From Failand they hailed. One day they qualied, railed, wailed, flailed, and, due to an excess of ale, ailed, went pale, frail, and – finally – failed to prevail.

One was devoured by a nightingale; one was jailed, then bailed, then inter-railed and derailed; two were trampled underfoot at a clearance sale; one got fired by e-mail; another got knifed in Perivale; three went stale; one went beyond the veil; two more got lost on a false trail for the Holy Grail; one went blind and couldn’t get its head round Braille; one got bogged down in too much extraneous detail; one got blown up by a suicide bomber in Israel; one suffered a calamitous betrayal; another embarked on a disastrous career in retail; one couldn’t decide if it was male or female; one expired because it could neither inhale or exhale; one succumbed to limescale; one fell in love and was cruelly rejected and then committed suicide in Marseilles; one was lynched by incensed anti-gastropod readers of the Daily Mail; two sailed to Shale in a pail and got caught in a gale of hail and then got swallowed by a whale; and the last got impaled on a rusty nail.

What a sorry tale. The snails could have prevailed, but, instead – unfortunately – they failed.

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